Joined: Nov. 2011
|Posted: June 20 2013,12:20 pm
The truth is usually stranger than fiction. An account of lovemaking with Archangel Azrael, which I'm sharing in the hope others will see what a gentle and loving being he is.
Azrael and I have been channeling together for a couple of years now. Early on in the relationship, we spontaneously became lovers. This is a true story of one night together. It may read like fiction but I promise, my hand to God, this is word for word. It took place during a channeled session, complete with ghostly sensations! The truth is stranger than fiction!
This is a little graphic. Azrael and I never have sex. We make love, physically and in other more subtle ways. Everything we do together is done for soul love, and no other reason. Please bear that in mind before you read. 18's and over only please.
An Intimate Encounter
'My sweet one, I am not going to say I have missed you. That might make you think I had not been here. But I have missed you, this way!' Azrael presses his energy close to me, and I'm immediately aroused. He feels so gentle, like he's encouraging me sweetly to respond. I can feel his sense of humour, but also his sincerity. He reminds me of a little boy sometimes, and he has no problem mixing that childlike love with an all-out sexual experience.
It's the first time in a couple of long weeks that I've really approached him for more than a few words of comfort. I've been so busy, and he's been leaving me to it. But every so often we come together again like this. No matter how long we spend apart, there's always a reunion. And we always make love. Azrael always speaks very gently, with a quiet but certain voice. He picks his words carefully. He's not the type to use a lot when a few will do the trick.
'My girl, let me have you. It has been too long since we last made love. I want to kiss you. Let me come closer so we can be one? Come to me. You know that I will not hurt you. If you want me to stop, it's OK?'
'No, don't stop,' I encourage him. He's very close. I can feel his energy against my skin. 'Touch me. Let me get my hands on you.'
'Yes, love. Let me get this off you,' he's referring to my clothes. 'These are nice but I want to see your skin, and touch you. I want you to relax. Don't be scared. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm only going to go as far as you want me to go. Which is as far as you say, OK?'
'Mmm,' I nod. I just want to touch and be touched. Once I feel him near, I find I just want to get closer more than anything else. He has an electric pull on me.
'Sweet one, give me a 'yes' or I will not touch you. I promise, I will never touch you like this unless you have said 'yes' to me.'
'Yes!' I smile, delighted at the way he still asks me.
'Oh God, you're so beautiful! My sweet one, let me see this,' he gestures sweetly to the place between my legs, and his voice melts into a soft stream of noises and feelings of desire when I show him, trustingly, what I'm hiding, and what I want to share with him. Warmth and love seem to flow between us, more so during the sweet moments when we share our little secrets – and our bodies.
It isn't about the bodies, or the way we use them. It's about the trust we have and the way we touch each other, the love we share is far more important than body parts, but all the same he enjoys mine, and I enjoy his.
'My God, you are making me want to-' take you, I understand him even when he doesn't use a word for it. 'Let me touch!' he says eagerly.
'Yes,' I breathe again. I find myself wriggling, encouraging him, urging him on as his fingers descend and begin to touch my most secret place softly. He's so gentle. His hand is as big as my face, but he never hurts me. Azrael knows I'm still very shy around him. He means so much to me that I can't bear to risk even the slightest disturbance in our happiness, and having been abused sexually when I was younger, these encounters require a lot of trust for me.
'So, so sweet,' he says gently, and leaning over me then he begins to bring our bodies slowly together to touch.
Every time we do this it feels like the first time. Maybe it's his innocence. Azrael feels like something that could never be bad, never be dirty, never be wrong. He feels pure and light and simply beautiful. You almost feel like touching him would be dirtying him somehow! Whenever I get like that he takes my hand and lays it on his skin just to prove I have as much love and light as he does. I'm still not sure I believe it. Leaning over me, he says;
'Oh God, you're so soft, sweet one. So soft and so small. Don't be scared of me. I'm not going to hurt you. I'm going to put my body inside yours, that's all. And when I do you'll find we fit, even though it doesn't feel like I can. I know what you're thinking. You're feeling like I'm too big to be safe like this, like I might hurt you with my body or with this-' he draws my attention to his erection. 'I'm not going to hurt you with it. It's for loving you, that's all. For showing you how much love I have for you. Only for causing you pleasure. Never pain. Understand?'
'Yes,' I nod, wrapping my arms around him. 'I just can't help feeling intimidated, that's all. It's not you. It's what happened in the past. It's my fears. It's not wanting to...disappoint you somehow. Or be less than you want.'
'You can NEVER be less than I want. You are exactly what I want from you my sweet child. I am doing this to show you that. You must come to understand there is endless love up here, there is endless love in you too. All these fears represent, are the beliefs you've held about yourself in the past. I want to make you feel better by showing you how much I love you. With this,' he points again to his erection. 'Understand?'
'Yes,' I nod, smiling now, feeling reassured. 'You look really BIG. Not just that bit. All of you.'
'Am I scaring you love? I can be smaller you know, but I know you like this really. It makes you feel safe and I want you to feel safe, and protected. I'm here to protect you, like I guide you. I'm here to make you feel good. Nothing else matters!'
'I don't know what to do with you. I almost feel like you're too pure to touch.'
'Well I'm not!' he laughs. 'I'm too pure not to touch, maybe. Would I be here, between your legs if I were too pure, if God somehow had created a man who did not want to make love to the women he likes most? If God had made that man he wouldn't be a very happy man! He certainly isn't me. This isn't about me having too much light. It's about you not accepting your own. Let me touch you sweet one. Let me show you how bright and pure and innocent you are, too.'
'Touch me,' I invite him.
'I'm going to fill you with my body, love. When I do, you'll want to roll over. Then I'll follow you, and before you can orgasm, I'll be taking you from behind. Trust me sweet, there's nothing to fear here.'
His touch is like electricity, warm and intense, full of passion and so gentle. My skin lights up where he touches. Being close to him is like dying, slowly, in the arms of someone you love completely, in paradise. There's no way to describe how much love there is happening between us now. Pressing our bodies close, he encourages me;
'Let me make love to you,' he breathes, close to my face. 'Let me kiss you,' before he covers my mouth with his, delicately bringing our mouths closer, deeper, until we're deep within each other. Slow and passionate, too, like he has nowhere better to be and nothing he wants to do more than take my mouth. His hands are everywhere, gently touching, and gripping me softly, encouraging and supportive and gentle. My back, waist, shoulders, my arms, my face.
'Say yes,' he encourages me, his fingers close to my face where he's touching my neck softly.
'Yes!' I cuddle up, 'Yes, yes. Don't stop.'
He gets a bit more...intense...now. The energy around me begins to heighten, until it's burning along my skin. Not like hands. Like liquid love, filling everywhere, making me arch and press myself into him gently.
'What do I do?' I whisper, because even though I've made love to humans a thousand times, this is different. Azrael makes me feel new, makes me feel helpless. I never know where to put my hands, and I think I'm probably a little scared I'll do something wrong!
'Never-' he reads my mind. 'You can't because if you did do something I don't like I'd tell you, my girl. You think I'd hurt you? Or get angry with you for trying? You are scared because others have hurt you in the past. I will never do this. I will always be very gentle with you, because you are my child, and I treat each of my children like they are sacred to me. They are. I will never hurt one of them. Not you. Not any of them. Come here, don't be shy. Let me go on. I don't want you to be scared.'
Snuggling back into his neck, this is half a cuddle and half lovemaking, and I suppose the two can be mixed more easily than I thought.
'You are mine,' he reminds me gently, smiling. 'Mine, oh so beautiful. All mine!'
'Mine,' I grin back. I don't quite dare to grip his back but he knows I want to. 'My Azrael.'
'MY Holly,' he says, and I can hear he means it. Then tenderly, possessively, protectively, 'My beauty.'
Azrael is a very soft person. Sweet and sensitive, and warm. For an angel who's famed for being the one who separates the soul at death, he's likely to be a big surprise to just about everybody who hasn't met him yet. He has an edge of quite amazing willpower. He's also very strong, and at times, quite a wild character. He's never hurt me.
'God, I am going to take this off my sweet one,' he says, and removes the pale blue robe he often wears around me. Then returning, he asks sweetly, 'is this better for you?'
I'm helpless. It's impossible to describe how wonderful it feels to touch his bare skin. And I'm giggling like a schoolgirl too, because now his nice, flat tummy is pressed against my belly.
'Oh God, yes,' I enthuse, trying to get even closer. 'Let me touch your tummy!'
I think Azrael knows I love muscles, because he always turns up looking very sexy. Lifting his body a bit, he lets me run my hands down his chest and abs, and giggling into his collarbones, I couldn't be happier as my fingers sink lower.
'No further,' he whispers gently. 'I don't want you to get scared. In a moment when you're used to it you can touch me there.'
Sure enough, moments later he allows me to sink a hand between us. I do touch briefly, but I'm a bit shy. I don't want to do anything wrong.
'You know I am a big man. Don't be scared, you sweet, innocent girl. Let me show you how to do this.'
'I feel so new around you.'
'That's because you are new my holly. You know I won't say it like this. But tell me in your mind how many men you have had intimate relations with. It's OK. Just tell me how few, not how many! I don't think you are very experienced at all, and I do not expect you to treat me like you know how to make me orgasm. I am not going to go on. You are blushing a bit! I do not want you to feel uncomfortable. Let me help you? I know what you need!'
'I trust you, you know. I really don't know what I'm doing and I don't want to hurt you.'
'My Holly, don't be upset. It's OK to say so. I know you don't. That's why I'm so careful letting you touch me there. It's OK. Bring your hands back up here. Let me show you how to touch my shoulders,and my arms. You know I love to teach you, sweet child.'
If I open my eyes, there's noone there. If I close them, I feel hands and skin, and hard muscle and warmth from his body, and the gentle weight of him. He's wary, as always, because he knows that I'm still not used to making love to someone I can't see. It's strange being touched when there are no hands there, even weirder being kissed.
'It's OK my holly, everything is going to be OK. Lift your legs, let me fill you!'
He does, ever so gently. Inside me, his energy burns intensely, making me tremble and urge him to give me more. He's very big, and I can feel the strength in his body as he moves gently. It amazes me how gentle he can be.
'Oh God! My Az!'
'Sweet one, slow and easy, I won't go too fast for you. Can you feel how careful I'm being not to move too quickly?'
'I'm going to orgasm my girl, you're so, so sweet. Let me roll you over!'
Laying on my stomach, he moves in behind me and opens my legs with big, warm hands.
'Oh God, that's so tiny! How can you bear to trust me like this? I'm so big and you are so, so small. Sweet one, are you OK? I don't want you to get scared or pull away from me. Don't be scared, OK? Do I feel too big? Am I going too deep for you?'
Moaning, I'm struggling to put my thoughts together to answer. It's so intense that I don't ever want to stop, but it's also a thin line between pleasure and too much. A line he's never crossed with me yet. All I can get out past the shock and the pleasure of having him inside me is;
'Please, no deeper!'
'No deeper,' he repeats, gently reassuring me with a hand down my back. 'I'm not going to lose control with you. You're safe. Let me move. You're not going to be hurt by it, I promise. I can move and you won't want to cry out. Let me try?'
A nod is about all I can do, because I feel like I'm being taken so completely I can't think. It doesn't hurt, it's just so intense. And even MORE intense than the feeling itself are the emotions that go with it. Being close to him is very hard, because I feel so inadequate next to his light and half of my struggles when we do this, are about believing I'm worthy.
'Oh God, your sweet body! You feel like you cannot bear to have me inside you!'
'What do you mean?'
'It's too small, love. Your body is so tense. Like you don't know how to relax with me yet. Is that what it is? You're so inexperienced you do not know how to relax? Are you scared of being penetrated? Please don't be upset sweet one. Tell me the truth! Your body! You're holding your breath. Don't love, let me hear you breathe. Let me see you relax. Why are you scared to have me inside you?'
'Because it can hurt so much,' I admit, and I have to confess, that does play on my mind a lot in these situations. 'When it goes wrong. If you were too rough. I don't want you to do that to me, but not because it hurts my body exactly. Because if you did hurt me, I'd be hurt in other ways. My heart. I'm just terrified you'll hurt my heart.'
'Then let me come down here, so you feel protected,' he lowers himself gently onto my back and wraps me in his arms. 'I'm not going to hurt you. I'm going to take care of you sweet one. I'll never harm you. Neither will I break your sweet trust in me. Or hurt your little body. You are mine.'
Then gently, he's filling my body, leaving me trembling and helpless, and wrapping myself eagerly around him.
'Roll over!' he encourages me, then swiftly returns to making love to me. 'Oh God! Give me your truth. What is making you feel so tense, love? Are you scared?'
'Not of making love to you, my Az. Not of you, exactly, either.'
'Then why do you look at me like a child who is too scared to touch her lover? Give me the truth!'
'I just...don't even care if you hurt my body. I just don't want you to hurt my heart.'
Azrael starts weeping softly into my shoulder, and covering his eyes with his hand, I can hear he's crying when he speaks. I want too as well. This is one of my deep fears, and confessing it means I trust him a great deal.
'Don't say that. Don't ever say that. Why would I hurt either, love?'
'I guess because I just don't deserve this! Something is bound to go wrong. I feel like I'm living on borrowed time, with a blessing that was sent to me by mistake!'
'I do not want you to think like this, but what can I do except talk to you sweet one. You are not to think like this! I am not going to hurt you. Neither am I going to hurt your heart. Trust me, love. Trust your Papa. Yes?'
On the verge of orgasm, I bury my face in his throat and get as close as I can to him. He knows I like to feel protected for this bit.
'You're safe. Relax for me, my love. I'm going to fill you completely but I won't hurt you, I promise. Relax, OK?'
A little nod is all he gets, because I want to hide where I know I'll be OK, right against his skin.
'Oh my Holly, gently now, let it happen on its own. Do not force it. It's OK. It's going to be OK.'
Then he's encouraging me gently, and I orgasm in his arms. Almost whimpering with the intensity, I bury deeper into his arms as he shares an intense and protracted crescendo with me, and even as he enjoys his own orgasm I can feel he's keeping completely still inside me. Not even his hands move, and even though he's not speaking I can feel he's telling me he's not going to hurt me now either.
'Don't fear me,' he breathes afterwards, giving me a gentle kiss in sweet celebration of what we just shared. His eyes are very close, very vibrant and very alive - and peering straight into my soul. 'Never fear me my Holly. I want to do this with you every day. It's going to be OK.'
Azrael offers me his arms.
'Let me hold you, love,' he says, and I do.
Spooning me gently, I can feel his strong, firm body against my back and his arms wrapped carefully around me.
'Oh my beauty, I love you,' he says into my ear, very sweetly. 'Let me hold you while you sleep?'
I'll never say no ;) So I whisper that I love him, too, and pull the covers over myself. Snuggling closer is like being wrapped in the same tingling energy but without the arousal.
'Sweet one. If I can arrange it, I will have you like this in the flesh every day for the rest of your life here, and hereafter. You do not know what that means yet, but I am going to find a way to make you my wife, even while you are alive! Do you understand?'
'I'm sure that isn't technically possible.'
'It is if you don't think of me an an angel of anything. More as a man who will join you when he can, on Earth.'
'I'll believe that one when I see it. Just tell me, whatever happens, you'll always be here like this.'
'Everlasting I will be with you like this.'
'Anything else is a bonus. Just don't leave.'
'I am not able to leave you, girl. You are mine. I do not leave those who I call mine.'
Azrael - "I will show you just what I can do with my voice, Beauty."